I Brought You My Bullets
by SN-Amethyst-UK
Summary: Series of unrelated drabbles based on the MCR album I Brought You My Bullets. Some AU, some BL, some mild violence, maybe OOC. KandaxAllenxLavi. Rated M for some chapters just to be safe. Summary at start of each chapter. Now complete.
1. Romance

**A/N Hello everyone! Thank you for taking the time to read this. This is my first foray into DGM fics. This will be a series of drabbles based on my favourite album of all time. Each chap will be based on one line from each of the songs in order. The chaps will not be connected in any way. This is a series of drabbles/very short fics. Some may be AU and they focus on Kanda, Allen and/or Lavi. Individual details at the start of each chapter. This is turning into a long note - thanks for sticking with me! Without further ado, on with the fics.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used - None. This is an instrumental piece**_

_**Pairing - AllenxKanda**_

_**Summary - Allen plans a surprise for Kanda.**_

1. ROMANCE

Allen stepped back to admire his work. There, in the middle of the room, stood his masterpiece – a small, put-up table with two folding chairs either side, artfully made to look like a private table in a fancy French restaurant. A pure white, pressed tablecloth draped over the table and a single candle was lit in the middle. The food rested in a picnic hamper to the side of the table.

Allen was so proud that he had managed to sneak all of this into the room with no-one noticing. He was so caught up in admiring the layout he hadn't heard the door behind him open.

'What have you done to my room, Beansprout?'

Allen jumped and turned to face Kanda. 'Kanda! You've ruined the surprise,' Allen pouted.

'Why are you trying to surprise me? And you still haven't answered my question.' Kanda drew closer to Allen as he spoke.

Allen blushed at the closeness and started to move backwards until he felt the back of one of the chairs against his lower body. Kanda maintained his distance to the younger boy, moving forward with every step backwards Allen took.

'So, Beansprout, what have you done to my room?' Kanda asked again.

Allen took a deep breath, drew himself to his full height and looked Kanda in the eyes, almost as if he was challenging the older boy to make a sarcastic comment. 'I made us dinner; just the two of us, away from everyone else.'

'And why would you do that? You know Jerry makes the best soba,' replied Kanda, trying his hardest not to sound condescending.

'It's called romance, Kanda! I thought I should make an effort as I haven't seen you for nearly two months,' Allen responded, sulkily.

'Well, then, that had better be soba in that picnic hamper or I'm off to the cafeteria.'

'Of course it is. I even brought enough for me!' Allen grinned.

'I hope you didn't put anything else in there for me. You know I can't stomach that sweet stuff you eat for dessert.' Kanda moved to take a seat at the table.

Allen leaned down to open the hamper, and replied over his shoulder with a smirk 'Oh, I think you'll really enjoy dessert.'

Kanda looked away as he felt a blush rise over the promise in Allen's words.


	2. Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough

**A/N Hello again! Firstly, Thank you to everyone who has read the first chapter of this little experiment :). Hugs to All! Anyway, here is the next little drabble. Please enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used - You can cry all you want to.**_

_**Pairing - LavixKanda**_

_**Summary - Lavi, restless after returning from a mission, tries to find his favourite person. Little did he know what was waiting for him.**_

2. Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us

Lavi had just returned from a long-term mission. He had really missed headquarters and everyone, but he had missed one person more than any other – Kanda. He didn't know why, but in the years that he had been Kanda's (self-proclaimed) best friend, the long-haired man had really grown on him. If the Panda wasn't always around, he would probably spend all his spare time following Kanda around. Lavi particularly liked to watch Kanda when he trained.

Lavi checked in with Komui, delivering his mission report with his usual efficiency. Bookman offered to take the Innocence to Hevlaska, leaving Lavi free for a while. He took the opportunity to partake in his favourite sport – Kanda hunting. He made a beeline for the training ground, hoping to catch a glimpse of his favourite samurai. He expected to see Kanda training or sparring with someone, or least meditating, but when he arrived the other boy was nowhere to be seen.

Lavi mentally judged the time. It was too late for lunch and too early for dinner so Kanda wouldn't be in the cafeteria. He was sure Kanda wasn't on a mission, as Komui normally told him when Kanda was away. Lavi decided to risk his pretty little neck and try Kanda's room.

Lavi knocked once and waited patiently for a couple of minutes. He didn't feel like coming face to face with the business end of Mugen today. When there was no response, Lavi knocked again and called out, 'Yuu-Chan, you in there?'

Lavi didn't hear the usual reply to Kanda's pet name or any reply at all. Deciding Kanda must not be at home, he opened the door and stepped inside – and froze in shock.

Kanda – the same Kanda who never showed any weakness – was curled up in a ball on his bed, eyes closed, with tear tracks on his cheeks. Lavi was unsure whether Kanda was asleep and was about to turn around and leave when Kanda spoke up.

'What do you want?' Kanda opened one eye a fraction and looked at Lavi.

'Just wondering where you were. Um, are you okay?' Lavi responded, stepping a little further into the others spartan room.

'What do you think?' Kanda snapped. He rolled over to face the wall, showing his back to Lavi.

'Yuu-Chan, if you don't mind me asking, why are you crying?' Lavi's bookman side wanted to know what would cause Kanda to cry, while his human side wanted to know why his best friend was in pain.

Feeling brave, Lavi perched himself on the end of Kanda's bed and rested a hand on the others lower leg. Kanda didn't respond to the touch and didn't look like he was going to answer.

'You can tell me when you're ready. I will be in the library if you want to see me,' Lavi stated as he stood. He moved towards the door. As he reached out for the handle, he felt a pair of arms encircle his waist.

'Don't go,' Kanda whispered as he leant against Lavi's back.

Lavi turned within the samurai's arms and raised the others chin. To his surprise, Kanda was still crying. Lavi pulled him into a tight hug.

'You can cry all you want to, Yuu-Chan. I'm not going anywhere,' Lavi whispered softly into Kanda's ear.


	3. Vampires Will Never Hurt You

**A/N Hello again! Sorry this has taken a while to get posted. All the stories are written in my notebook. I'm just being lazy in typing them up! Anyway, please enjoy this next little fic.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used - I'll never let them hurt you.**_

_**Pairing - AllenxKanda**_

_**Summary - Kanda is concerned for Allen. Where could the Beansprout be?**_

3. Vampires Will Never Hurt You

The whispering was getting louder. Allen tried to shut it out but it kept getting louder. He had retreated to an unused part of headquarters to try and get some peace, hoping that being away from everyone would help. Sat in the corner of the dark room, Allen pulled his knees up to his chest and covered his ears. He knew it wouldn't work – how do you block out voices from inside your own head? Allen knew what the whispering voice meant; the 14th was gaining strength. It wouldn't be long now before Allen disappeared and he took control. He had rebelled against the change with everything he had but he was so tired. He didn't think he was strong enough to fight anymore.

Frustrated at the situation, Allen screamed at the top of his lungs and slammed his fists into the flagstone floor repeatedly.

Kanda had been worried about Allen when he didn't turn up for dinner. All enquiries he made into the others whereabouts were met with shrugs or blank looks. He was beginning to feel frustrated. He had noticed Allen was acting stranger than usual. After trying all the usual places the younger Exorcist could be found, and having no success, Kanda started to wander headquarters randomly, not noticing which corridors he was taking.

Eventually, he found Allen huddled in the corner of one of the darkest rooms in headquarters. It was just about the furthest place from everyone that you could get. Kanda knew this as he had often frequented this room when he needed peace and Lavi was insistent about not giving him any, no matter what threats he made. Satisfied that he knew where Allen was, and no longer feeling frustrated, Kanda turned to leave. At that moment, Allen screamed. Turning around, Kanda saw the younger boy pummel the ground with his fists. He rushed to Allen and knelt in front of him, gently lifting his fists.

Allen hadn't noticed Kanda enter the room and gasped in shock when he felt rough hands round his. Gazing into Kanda's eyes, he only saw concern.

'Why are you hurting yourself, Beansprout?' Kanda asked, noticing how the sides of Allen's hands were grazed and bleeding.

'He's coming and I can't stop him. I'm not strong enough. If he takes over, they'll take me away and hurt me. I need to stop him but I don't know how!' Allen broke down and started sobbing.

Who's coming?' Kanda asked, confused.

Kanda had never seen Allen look so weak before. He had seen first hand the effects of Allen's stubborn and determined nature.

'He's going to take my body and I know I can't stop him. Why can't I stop him? Why can't I be stronger?' Allen yelled as he wrenched his hands from Kanda's grip.

Kanda shuffled so that he was sat next to Allen, back leaning against the cold brick wall.

'I don't know who you're talking about, but you are strong enough to resist. Where's the stubborn, determined Beansprout gone; the one who wouldn't let me just rip the Innocence from a doll because she was alive? The one who lost his arm and Innocence, only to find the strength to get it back? Does that sound like a weak person to you?'

Allen stared straight ahead. He didn't know what to say. Who would have thought Kanda thought he was a strong person? The two sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity to Allen. Eventually he felt the need to break the silence.

'But what if I do change? They'll come for me, regardless. It doesn't matter which side takes me. I won't get off lightly.' Allen hung his head in defeat.

'Allen, know this. Whatever happens, I'll never let them hurt you.'

With those words, Kanda stood and left the other to his musings.

Allen stared at the others back as he left the room. His heart suddenly felt lighter and he couldn't hear the whispering anymore. Kanda's parting words and given him hope and strength. He knew that he would win this fight against his other self. He was no longer alone in the battle.


	4. Drowning Lessons

**A/N Hello loyal readers and newbies. Here is the next chapter for you all. Two chapters in one week!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used - We'll say goodbye for the hundreth time and tomorrow we'll do it again.**_

_**Pairing - AllenxLavi**_

_**Summary - Allen doesn't like to say goodbye.**_

4. Drowning Lessons

Allen was sat outside Komui's office. He leant his head back against the stone walls as he waited for Lavi to emerge from the supervisor's room. After what felt like an age, Allen heard the door open. Quickly standing, Allen followed Lavi. He wasn't surprised that Lavi hadn't spoken to him as Bookman was there. He did notice how Lavi managed to exit the room in such a way that Allen was hidden from Bookman's view.

Allen kept following a little distance behind the pair until Bookman entered the library. Allen wished he could have heard the excuse Lavi used to get out of his duties this time. They were usually very interesting but somehow still plausible. Lavi walked a further along the corridor but had slowed down enough to allow Allen to catch up. It was common for the two to meet this way.

Once Allen had caught up, Lavi grabbed his hand and pulled him into the nearest empty room. Lavi released Allen and walked further into the depths of the room. Allen made sure to close the door quietly. He didn't want to draw attention to where they were.

Allen leant his forehead against the wood of the door for a moment before turning round to face the read-haired boy. Lavi was standing in the centre of the large room with a small, sad smile upon his face. He never hid his true emotions when they were alone. Allen instantly knew what the smile meant – he was going to have to say goodbye to Lavi again. Allen walked forward into Lavi's waiting arms. The older Exorcist wrapped Allen in a tight hug.

'Don't worry, Allen. I won't be gone long. Just a couple of weeks. Komui says it's a fairly routine mission,' Lavi tried to chuckle at that but it fell flat.

'Why can't I go on more missions with you?' Allen asked.

Lavi released his hold on Allen and stepped back so he could look at the others face.

'You know why, Allen. The higher ups are worried about the Fourteenth.' Lavi could clearly remember watching as General Cross explained everything to Allen.

'But you keep me grounded; stop him from gaining control. Why can't we just tell them that?' Allen looked down at his feet, unable to look Lavi in the eye any longer.

'Allen, I know why you're really upset. You don't want to say goodbye in case I don't come back. Let me tell you this – we'll say goodbye for the hundredth time, and tomorrow we'll do it again. Well, not literally tomorrow, but you know what I mean,' Lavi smiled as he lifted Allen's chin. He was surprised to see the younger boy smiling at him.

'Only a bookman would remember how many times we've said goodbye since we've known each other,' Allen chuckled.

Lavi pulled Allen into another hug. 'Oh, Love, that's only how may times we've said goodbye since we've been together.'


	5. Our Lady Of Sorrow

**A/N Hello again everyone. Firstly I would like to thank mychemicalbitchbot and Lola for their kind reviews. I am rubbish at replying directly so I hope this does guys! On a side note, I don't really like this story but couldn't find another way to do it.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used - Take my hand and never be afraid again (Yes, I went for the pg version!)**_

_**Pairing - KandaxLavi**_

_**Summary - Lavi is scared and fighting for control.**_

5. Our Lady of Sorrow

It had been along mission. Lavi was exhausted. He was sure that Kanda was also starting to feel tired – just not as bad as him. Of course, Kanda would never show any weakness – that and the accelerated healing abilities that were probably fighting the effects of tiredness.

The Innocence had been found and was being kept safe by one of the finders who had accompanied them on this mission. The only reason they hadn't left the village for headquarters was the wall of Akuma station around it. It didn't matter how many the two exorcists killed, more would fill their place in a very short amount of time. They had called for back-up. Komui assured them that he would send as many exorcists as he could spare.

The call had gone out two days previous and they were still waiting for the promised back-up to arrive. Kanda had just left the house they had commandeered to have another go at getting through the Akuma. Lavi couldn't bring himself to follow. He was worried about getting weaker. It wasn't just the debilitating exhaustion – he was also heavily bruised from all the fighting. His main concern, however, was his mental weakness. Ever since the Ark, Deak had been a constant presence in his mind and when Lavi was weakened, he could feel Deak gaining control and strength. Lavi didn't want to admit it, but he was afraid that he would slip back into his forty-eighth persona. He didn't like that boy anymore – he found him cold and remote. Lavi was a much nicer person to be and he was sure his friends in the order would agree. Friends…

Lavi quickly held an internal debate with himself on Kanda's safety. He knew his best friend was strong – one of the strongest 'ordinary' exorcists – but he was also worried that Kanda was a little reckless when it came to defeating Akuma. He believed that Kanda would sacrifice himself to get everyone to safety, even if he wouldn't admit that he cared for any of them. Lavi's concern for Kanda's safety won out over his bone-deep exhaustion and he headed out in the direction Kanda had gone an hour earlier.

Upon reaching the edge of the village, Lavi was assaulted by several Akuma. He took out a couple with his hammer as he was slowly pushed back by the onslaught. The adrenalin that had sustained him suddenly stopped and the exhaustion came back. Lavi collapsed to his knees.

One of the Akuma lined him up for a killing shot and Lavi bowed his head in defeat. He had run out of strength and will. He waited for the blow to land but it never came. Looking up, he saw Kanda standing in the centre of ring of Akuma bodies. As Lavi stood, gazing at Kanda, he felt his control slip and Deak entered his consciousness. Lavi panicked. Dropping back to ground, he fought for control of his own mind. The fear must have shown on his face as he heard Kanda's concerned voice. The words didn't register but the tone was enough.

'Pardon?' Lavi asked once he felt more like himself.

'I asked if you were alright. I've never seen you scared of a few Akuma before.'

'Sorry, Yuu. I don't know what came over me just then,' Lavi tried to laugh it off but, oddly, he couldn't rustle up his ever-cheerful mask. He was still feeling a little shaken. He was relieved, however, that Kanda only thought he was scared of the Akuma.

'Don't stay down there. More will be along in a minute. Take my hand and never be afraid again,' Kanda said, offering his hand to Lavi.

Lavi took the offered hand, surprised at Kanda's gentleness. Kanda pulled him to his feet and they stood, hand-in-hand, waiting for the next hoard of Akuma. Lavi felt that as long as Kanda had his hand and his back, Deak would never gain control.


	6. Headfirst for Halos

**A/N Hello everyone! I'm sorry for disappearing on you all but sometimes life gets in the way. Anyway, I'm back with a new chapter and this one is for my favourite song on the album. Please enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used – I can't begin to let you know just what I'm feeling.**_

_**Pairing - KandaxAllen**_

_**Summary – Allen asks Kanda a difficult question.**_

* * *

><p>6. Headfirst for Halos<p>

It was one of those rare, lazy days in the Order. No-one was on a mission so headquarters was a little crowded. Allen has never realised how many people there were. He decided he needed to get away from the hustle and bustle of the cafeteria. With no fixed destination in mind, Allen started to wander the corridors. His feet eventually led him to the training ground.

Kanda was stood in the middle of the area, starting some warm-up exercises.

'_Not been here long, then,_' thought Allen. He silently watched the elder boy from the shadows, admiring the way the muscles in Kanda's arms and bare chest rippled as his movements become more fluid. Allen couldn't remember if he had ever seen the other look clumsy, like himself.

Allen was surprised that he hadn't been noticed. '_Time to change that,_' Allen thought.

Allen stepped from the shadows and cleared his throat loudly. He was disappointed that the other turned around smoothly, not hint of surprise in his face – just the usual annoyed look he held when around anyone. '_He obviously knew I was here,_' Allen pouted, mentally.

'What do you want, Beansprout?' Kanda asked.

'Can I train with you? Practice always makes perfect!' Allen grinned at the Samurai.

'Tch, whatever,' Kanda muttered as he went back to his warm-ups.

Allen ran through his own warm-up routine, still watching Kanda. Allen really admired the other for his strength, grace and beauty. Allen was curious to know what the other thought of him. He found himself needing Kanda's approval and friendship.

'Kanda, do you like me?' he asked, suddenly.

'What does that have to do with training?' Kanda retorted, anger seeping in to his tone.

'Don't make an argument out of this,' Allen sighed, 'I just want an honest answer from you for once.'

Kanda was taken aback. It was rare for Allen not to rise to his angry, argumentative tone. Hell, they would argue over anything. Abruptly, Kanda sat on the stone floor of the training ground. Allen stared in shock at the action.

'Beansprout, don't just stand there gawping. Sit,' Kanda ordered.

Allen did as he was told and sat opposite Kanda, facing him.

'Is it that important that you know what I think of you?' Kanda questioned.

Allen could only nod his head in response. He was a little surprised that Kanda was volunteering to have a civil conversation with him.

'Allen…' Kanda continued after a moment gathering his thoughts, 'I do like you. I'm not sure what I feel toward you, though. I have this maelstrom of emotions when I look at you or talk to you. It's… difficult for me to understand. I can't begin to let you know just what I'm feeling,' Kanda finished. He sat, watching the younger boy and waiting for his response.

It wasn't quite what he was expecting.

Allen sat for a moment, head bowed, digesting what Kanda had just admitted. He raised his head and looked into Kanda's eyes. Seeing what he was looking for, Allen rose to his knees and grabbed Kanda's shoulders. Pulling the other closer to himself, Allen met Kanda's lips halfway.

Kanda, slightly confused by the younger Exorcist's actions, closed his eyes and pulled Allen into a deeper kiss.

'Has that helped you make sense of your feelings?' Allen enquired when they broke for air.

Kanda's response was to pull Allen into another kiss.


	7. Skylines & Turnstiles

**A/N Hello again everyone! I'm on an update frenzy. Trying to get all the chapters for this fic uploaded before the end of the long weekend. Hopefully that will keep everyone going until I manage to get the sequel typed and uploaded!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used – Tell me where we go from here.**_

_**Pairing - LavixAllen**_

_**Summary – Allen finds himself getting jealous.**_

* * *

><p>7. Skylines and Turnstiles<p>

Lavi sat in awe as Allen inhaled his latest meal. He knew that parasite types ate more than a normal person but the speed at which Allen ate always amazed him. He remembered asking Allen about it once. Allen had turned to him, a menacing aura emanating from him, and admitted 'When you travel with Cross, you learn to eat fast. He didn't hang around to pay the bill and I needed to scarper before the restaurant owners discovered this.'

Lavi honestly didn't think Cross was that bad. He was somewhat of a hero to the young redhead. Like Lavi, Cross enjoyed the ladies and having a good time.

Lavi remembered the buxom beauty he met on the last mission. She had the palest skin Lavi had seen on anyone but Allen, and the cutest light pink lips. Lost in his daydreams, Lavi hadn't noticed Allen was done with his meal.

Allen was about to stand up when he noticed the distant gaze on Lavi's face. He felt his heart contract at the sight. He knew that look. '_Must be thinking about girls again,_' he thought. Resting a hand on his chest lightly in order to relieve the pain, Allen turned his face from Lavi. He had known for a while that he liked Lavi more than a friend should and to think that the object of his affections was thinking about girls made him jealous. He had to get away. In his haste to leave the table, Allen knocked into his neat pile of plates. The clatter woke Lavi from his dreaming.

'Hey, Allen, ready to go?' Lavi enquired with a smile on his face.

Without looking at Lavi, Allen quickly restacked the fallen plates before rushing from the room. Lavi was confused at the actions of the other boy. Surely he wasn't embarrassed that he had knocked the plates over?

'Allen, wait up,' Lavi called after the retreating back of the younger boy, following him from the room.

Allen had only made it a couple of corridors away before he stopped.

'Why did I run off like that?' he chastised himself, 'Now Lavi's going to know something's wrong. Maybe I should go and apologise for being so rude.'

Allen turned around and headed back in the direction he had come from. As he turned a corner, Lavi barrelled into him, knocking them both to the floor. Allen was temporarily winded from the impact and fall. He didn't, however, fail to notice that Lavi had quickly cradled his head to stop it coming into contact with the hard, stone floor. As Allen regained his breath, he became aware that Lavi hadn't moved.

'Um, Lavi, think you could get up? You're a little heavy,' Allen said.

Lavi looked at Allen before pushing himself to his knees, Allen's thighs between his legs. Lavi remained straddling Allen as the other boy pushed himself up on his elbows.

'Allen, why did you run from the cafeteria?' Lavi asked, 'You only knocked over a couple of plates.'

Allen turned his head to the side as if he suddenly found the wall very interesting. 'I just needed to get out of there. No particular reason,' he responded.

'Allen, look at me,' Lavi insisted while grasping Allen's chin gently and pulling his face round. 'Can you give me the real reason now?'

'Promise you won't laugh at me,' Allen glanced up at the other. Lavi nodded his head in agreement.

Allen took a deep breath. 'I left quickly because I was jealous,' he admitted.

'Jealous? Jealous of what?' Lavi queried. Allen had piqued his curiosity.

Looking into Lavi's eye, Allen knew he would have to answer now. Lavi had that weird gleam in his eye that meant he would get the answers he wanted, whether Allen was willing to give them or not.

'I was jealous because I could tell you were daydreaming about a girl,' Allen replied.

'Oh, Allen, you can have any girl you want. No need to be jealous,' Lavi suppressed a chuckle.

'I wasn't jealous because I can't get a girlfriend,' Allen continued, 'I was jealous because you weren't thinking about me.' As soon as the words passed his lips, Allen wished he could take them back.

Lavi was completely shocked at the revelation. He had no idea Allen thought like that.

'How long Allen?' Lavi enquired, 'How long have you wanted me to think about you in that way?'

'Ever since I met you,' Allen made to pull himself from under the older boy but was stopped by a hand on his chest.

Allen, head at a slight angle, looked at Lavi questioningly. Lavi appeared to be thinking something over as he looked at Allen, but was concentrating on a point only he could see. Allen could tell when Lavi had reached a decision as his eye suddenly focused on him. Before Allen could say anything, Lavi was kissing him. It was a short, sweet, chaste kiss.

'So, Allen, tell me where we go from here?' Lavi asked.

Allen was stunned by the question. 'Are you saying you want to be with me?'

'Yes. I like you a lot, Allen, and I would like to learn to love you,' Lavi responded.

A huge grin spread across Allen's face. He threw his arms around Lavi's neck and pulled him into another kiss.


	8. Early Sunsets over Monroeville

**A/N Hello! Here is story 8 of 11. This one comes with warnings – Please note that this is AU, therefore the characters are probably more OOC than normal. Also there is character death and mentions of violence. I also need to apologise for yesterday if I caused any confusion. I noticed an error in the disclaimer for all chapters so fixed it and re-uploaded them all. Thank you for bearing with me. Anyway, on with the story.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used – I never thought they'd get me here**_

_**Pairing - LavixAllen**_

_**Summary – Allen and Lavi are on the run.**_

* * *

><p>8. Early Sunsets over Monroeville<p>

'Allen, you've got to keep moving. If we stop, they'll get us.'

Allen turned to Lavi. 'I'm tired of running. Maybe I should let them catch me. Give you time to get away.'

Lavi walked over to Allen and grabbed his arm. 'Allen, Tyki deserved what he got. It was him or us. Don't you ever forget that,' Lavi practically screamed at the younger boy. 'Come on, I think I know a safe place for the night.'

Lavi led Allen to an abandoned warehouse. It looked like no-one had been there in a while. A thick layer of dust covered the items left behind. The windows were high up on the wall and were all broken. Lavi was glad to discover that the doors still appeared to be intact and in working order, even if they had no locks. He hastily set about shutting all the doors while Allen looked for a place to bed down for the night. Allen found a small office at ground level.

'Lavi, I think we'll sleep in here,' Allen called to his friend.

'Okay, you get some sleep and I'll keep watch,' Lavi responded.

Allen made himself as comfortable as possible on the hard floor but he knew he would never fall asleep. He kept seeing Lavi, covered in blood, holding a knife over Tyki. Tyki - the man who saved Allen from the streets only to betray his trust by trying to sell the boy to the highest bidder. It was the night before this one that Tyki had come to Allen to let the youngster know he had been sold. Lavi had been with Allen at the time. Allen had never seen such a look on the redhead's face before.

Next thing Allen knew, Lavi was stood there, clutching a knife, while Tyki lay in an ever growing pool of his own blood.

Allen felt it was pointless to just stay in the office waiting for his turn at watch. He wandered from the office over to where Lavi was. Lavi had positioned himself near the front entrance of the warehouse but he didn't seem to be keeping watch. A distant look graced his features and his one visible eye was glazed over.

Cautiously, Allen got closer to the older boy until he sat next to him.

'Lavi, are you okay?' Allen asked.

'Sure, Allen. I'm just keeping watch. How about you?' Lavi tried to grin but it fell flat when he saw Allen's expression.

'I was thinking about what happened?' Allen responded, 'Why did you do that?'

'Allen, you know how I wear this eyepatch?' Lavi asked. He watched Allen nod in response. 'That's what happened when Tyki sold me. I didn't behave like a good toy should so the guy who bought me took a knife to me. He also cut my back up pretty badly. Said if he couldn't have me then he would make sure no-one else ever bought me either. He dumped me outside Tyki's place, stark naked, in a snowstorm. That would have happened to you as well. Sold to someone as a toy, then used and abused until you couldn't take it anymore. I didn't want you to go through that. You are better than that.'

Allen had tears in his eyes as Lavi finished. He didn't know what to say. Just as he was about to pull his friend into a hug, Lavi stood suddenly.

'I never thought they'd get me here. Allen, run. I'll deal with them.'

Allen hesitated. 'Run!' Lavi shouted as he pushed the other in the opposite direction.

Allen took to his heels and headed for one of the back doors. He turned back one last time to see Lavi surrounded by seven men, each holding a weapon. Allen recognised them as Tyki's bodyguards. He wanted to stay and help but knew it was useless, so he abandoned the only friend he had ever known.


	9. This Is The Best Day Ever

**A/N Hello! Warning again for this one - this is AU, therefore the characters are probably more OOC than normal. Also, I warn for vague hospital references. I do not mean to offend anyone with this fic. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used – We can get out. We don't have to stay.**_

_**Pairing - KandaxLavi**_

_**Summary – Kanda changes wards and meets a patient who shouldn't be there.**_

* * *

><p>9. This is the Best Day Ever<p>

'Time for your meds,' the orderly called through the door. Unlocking the door and entering the room, he met the ward's most notorious patient – _Lavi_. He refused to give anyone his real name and the hospital records had him listed officially as John Doe. Kanda had been eager to get on this round just to meet the boy. No-one had ever fascinated him before, but when he heard the other orderlies and nurses talking about the redhead he became instantly intrigued and determined to find out more.

So, here he was. Lavi was sat on his bed, right against the wall. Kanda glanced around quickly. The room was similar to the others on the ward but the bed had been bolted to the floor. The small locker, which the other patients had next to their beds, was missing from Lavi's room. The crisp, white bed linen was still neatly tucked in. It looked like the bed has just been made, leading Kanda to believe that the other male in the room hadn't slept the previous night.

Walking over to the bed with the small pot of pills and a glass of water, Kanda took in the others appearance. He was wearing a simple, grey sweatshirt over a pair of black jogging bottoms. The one striking feature was the eyepatch. Kanda longed to ask how Lavi came to be wearing it but he heard from the other staff that Lavi would become violent when asked.

'You're new. What's your name?'

Kanda was surprised when Lavi spoke. 'I'm Yuu Kanda. Everyone just calls me Kanda though. I transferred to the ward at the beginning of the week,' Kanda replied, handing the pills and water to Lavi.

'Nice to meet you, Yuu,' Lavi grinned before swallowing his pills. Kanda frowned at the use of his first name but let it slide.

Handing the glass and pot back to Kanda, Lavi turned to face the wall. Kanda knew the pills would take effect quickly and Lavi would no longer want to talk, so he turned and left the room, locking the door behind him.

Over the next few weeks, Kanda spent more time with Lavi. He would delay giving the other his pills as he enjoyed speaking with him. Lavi had a dry sense of humour and a quick wit. He kept Kanda on his toes. Kanda was slowly learning more about the redhead and hoped he would eventually open up about his past. Kanda was surprised to learn that Lavi had a very good memory and could recall every word of every conversation they had ever had.

As Kanda's time with Lavi started to stretch to twenty minutes, the other staff on the ward started whispering about their relationship. Kanda would hear them in the break room when they thought he wasn't listening. This had Kanda worried – worried what his boss would do.

After six months of getting to know Lavi and ignoring the rumours, Kanda began to doubt why Lavi was on the ward at all. His records showed that he had a second personality – occasionally, a side calling himself _Deak_ would emerge. Kanda had never met Deak and wondered if this was a fabrication on the part of the doctors to keep Lavi locked up. If Lavi was reluctant to give out his real name, who's to say he hadn't given some of the doctors a different one. The records also listed Lavi as a violent person, which was why he had his own, lockable room. Once again, Kanda doubted this information. He had no reason to believe that Lavi was violent, even though it was those rumours that had intrigued him at first.

Kanda started plotting. He had really grown to care for Lavi and felt he would do better on the outside, off the pills. At home, he readied his guest room and bought the other some clothes. He spent hours at night working on his plan to spring Lavi from the hospital.

Eight months after the first meeting, Kanda put his plan into action.

Entering the ward, Kanda checked the night staff were busy before heading to Lavi's room. He quietly unlocked and opened the door, heading straight towards the bed. He gently shook Lavi awake. As expected, Lavi was lying on top of the blankets. He had explained to Kanda once that lying under the blankets made him feel like he was being smothered.

Lavi slowly roused. 'Yuu, what are you doing here at night?'

'Lavi, we can get out. We don't have to stay,' Kanda whispered, anxiously glancing at the doorway.

'What do you mean, Yuu?' Lavi was still half asleep and slightly confused at the turn of events.

'I'm going to break you out. You are coming to live with me.'

'Why would you do that for me? You don't even know me!' Lavi snapped.

'Shh. Keep your voice down,' Kanda glanced back through the doorway, 'I'm doing this because I care about you. I don't think being in here is doing you any good, especially locked away from everyone. I'm sure that you aren't even supposed to be here in the first place.'

This got Lavi's attention. Kanda had been the only person to notice that. 'How? How are you going to get me off the ward, let alone out of the hospital?' Lavi asked as he sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed.

'Don't you worry about that, I have a plan,' Kanda responded as he grasped Lavi's hand and pulled him to his feet, 'Just don't let go of my hand.'

With those words Kanda led Lavi from the room, towards freedom.


	10. Cubicles

**A/N Hello! Here is chapter 10 of 11. Kind of sad that this is nearly all posted but as mentioned before, I am working on a follow up to this based on MCRs second album. Please keep a weather eye on the horizon for that one. In the meantime, on with fic 10! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used – I can't help but think I'll die alone.**_

_**Pairing - KandaxLavixAllen**_

_**Summary – Kanda opens up to his 'friends'.**_

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><p>10. Cubicles<p>

Kanda launched another furious attack against Allen. Allen barely saw the sword as it clattered against his, ripping the blade from his hand.

'Yuu, I know Allen told you not to go easy on him but you are aiming to kill,' Lavi called from the sidelines. He had volunteered to watch the pair spar. Komui was concerned that one day they would really hurt each other so they were not allowed to train together alone.

Kanda turned to Lavi, pointing his sword. 'Don't call me that!'

This gave Allen a chance to recover his own sword and launch an attack at Kanda. Kanda quickly spun and blocked the attack. The two blades slid against each other, bringing the boys face to face.

'You should attack like you mean it,' Kanda growled at Allen before pushing him away.

Allen backed away a few feet, before throwing down his sword. 'I can't do this anymore! Why won't you let me use my Innocence?' he shouted at Kanda.

'Because your Innocence has no weight when you wield it, like Lavi and his hammer. Practicing with a real sword will make your attacks faster,' Kanda explained wearily as he sheathed his Mugen.

Allen sighed and walked over to Lavi.

'Oh Yuu, you're a good guy after all,' Lavi smirked as Allen made his way over to him.

'Don't call me that! And it's only so I don't have to risk my life saving the Beansprout again. If he can defend himself properly, then I can concentrate on my battles,' Kanda explained as he walked over to join the pair.

'Lavi's right, Kanda. Why else would you worry about me?' Allen asked.

Kanda didn't know how to reply to that so he took a seat on the floor with his back against the wall. He carefully placed Mugen on the floor in front of him. Lavi and Allen glanced at each and then, following Kanda's example, seated themselves on either side of the dark haired boy.

So, Yuu…' Lavi began

'Why don't you show us your caring side more often?' Allen finished.

Kanda glanced at his fellow Exorcists. _'Great, now they're ganging up on me,'_ he thought.

'I tolerate you both, at best,' he replied.

'See, Allen? He does think of us as friends,' Lavi grinned.

'How on earth did you get that from the word _tolerate_?' quizzed Allen.

'Cause if he really hated us he wouldn't even bother with that!'

Kanda was beginning to grow tired of the conversation. He knew he would soon be at his limit for dealing with Allen and Lavi.

'So, Yuu, ever had a friend you liked?' Lavi enquired.

Kanda turned to look at the redhead. 'I have never had a friend in my life. I don't have time for such things.'

'Well, I'm your friend and so is Allen. Right, Allen?'

'Yeah, sure. I love being insulted by my friends on a daily basis,' Allen responded, sarcastically.

'Maybe you should try to be nice to more people, Yuu? I know Marie thinks of you as a friend, so does Lenalee. So, there you go. Four friends already but I'm sure you could make more,' Lavi reasoned.

'Why would I need more friends?' Kanda sighed.

'So you are admitting that you've got friends?' Allen said quickly.

'No! Just people I tolerate,' Kanda snapped.

'But why do you tolerate us?' Lavi's interest was piqued.

Kanda sighed again. He was worried that was becoming a new habit. He contemplated his answer for a while. He figured that Allen would probably let it go if he decided not to answer but Lavi had that gleam in his eye. Kanda opted, for once, to be honest with his comrades, and himself.

'I want people to remember me, mourn my passing. I can't help but think I'll die alone and I want someone to notice if I don't come home.'

Allen was rendered speechless by the older boy's confession. Lavi, however, wasn't. 'You'll be an old man, surrounded by your loved ones, when you die.'

'Be realistic, Lavi. How many of us are likely to survive this war? None of us have that long left,' Kanda stated.

The dejected tone of Kanda's voice prompted Allen to respond. 'Don't worry, Kanda. I'll make sure that you are not alone when you die.'


	11. Demolition Lovers

**A/N Hello for the final time! This is the last chapter for this fic. I would like to thank everyone who has stuck with me this far!**

**Major warnings for this one – It is AU so expect OOCness. Also, character death, violence, blood. Please do not read any further if this is a problem.**

**FYI – sections in _italics_ denote memories/journal entries.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own, D Gray Man :(**

_**Line used – After all the things we put each other through.**_

_**Pairing - KandaxAllen**_

_**Summary – What has Kanda done?**_

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><p>11. Demolition Lovers<p>

Kanda couldn't believe what he had just done. He didn't understand why he had done it. What had possessed him to do that?

He walked back into the small bathroom of the apartment he shared with Allen. He remembered when he and Allen had chosen the bathroom suite.

_Allen had spent ages online finding the perfect suite only to change his mind when they were at the shopping centre. Kanda moaned at Allen's indecision and pointed out that the bathroom could have been finished earlier if only Allen had gone to the shops first._

Kanda turned and left the bathroom. He wandered around the apartment, reliving the many happy memories he and Allen had made in their home.

_It had been one year previous that Kanda had asked Allen to move in with him. Allen had instantly agreed but insisted they find a place of their own. He didn't want to live with Kanda's brothers and he needed to get away from Cross. It had taken only two weeks for the pair to find the perfect apartment. The next three months were spent decorating. Kanda found it cute how Allen would climb into bed, late at night, with different coloured splotches of paint in his white hair. Despite the dirt, Kanda pulled the younger boy into his arms for the night._

Kanda wandered from room to room. He didn't have any purpose – he just wanted to stay busy. The living room, painted beige and cream, was through a door to his right. Kanda remembered many evenings curled up on the cream sofa with Allen in his arms. Back then there were no problems. Everything was fine. Kanda remembered how, one dark winters evening, on that very sofa, Allen had told him about his new job. That was when things started to change.

_Allen had returned later than usual from his job. He was teaching piano at the local college. When Kanda has asked where Allen had been, Allen had nearly bitten his head off with his reply. Kanda slept on the sofa that night._

Kanda could pinpoint that night as the moment things had gone wrong and the moment that led him to his recent actions.

He loved Allen more than anything. He just wished he could explain that to Allen. Kanda was a private person and he wasn't comfortable talking about his feelings. After that night, Kanda started following Allen. Kanda discovered that Allen was meeting with someone – someone Kanda recognised. Kanda hadn't seen Lavi in years but they were best friends as teenagers.

_He was surprised to see Allen with Lavi. Kanda hadn't known they were acquainted. He watched as the pair talked and laughed. He watched as Lavi put an arm around Allen and leaned in for a kiss. He didn't stay to watch anymore._

Still wandering the apartment, Kanda reached the bedroom. Walking round to Allen's side of the bed, he knelt next to it and rested his head on the deep blue duvet. He wanted to cry but the tears wouldn't come. The shock of his actions was receding and he knew he needed to do something. Pulling himself upright on his knees, he glanced at the floor. Jutting out from under the bed was Allen's journal. Kanda knew he shouldn't read it, didn't want to read it, but he thought it might explain what Allen had been doing for the last few months with Lavi.

Sitting cross-legged on the floor, Kanda began to read.

_August 1st  
><em>_Moved in with Yuu today. Can't believe he asked me, out of the blue, just two weeks ago. We've got a small apartment – 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom, living room and kitchen. It seriously needs decorating! We can worry about that tomorrow though._

_November 2nd  
><em>_Decorating is finished! The apartment now feels like home. Yuu let me have final say in the colour schemes but I hope he likes it too. I want to spend the rest of my life here with him._

_January 4th  
><em>_I have a new job! I'm going to be teaching piano at the local college. I start tomorrow. Can't wait to tell Yuu._

_January 15th  
><em>_One of my pupils asked me out today. Redhead named Lavi. I told him that it wasn't appropriate as I'm his teacher and also that I'm in a committed relationship. He laughed at me and left! I'm not quite sure what to make of this._

_February 14th  
><em>_Valentines! Spent the entire day with Yuu. It's nice to see his softer side occasionally. Yuu is currently asleep – exhausted from our activities! I love to watch him sleep. He looks so peaceful._

_March 17th  
><em>_Strange day at work. Lavi had his lesson, as usual, but asked me out for a beer. 'Just as friends' he said. One of the other teachers, Tyki, insisted on coming as well. I'm grateful for that as Lavi's a little intense. Stayed out quite late. Yuu was very aggressive when I got in. I snapped back at him. I didn't mean to but he had riled me up! Why can't he trust me? Anyway, he's spending the night on the sofa._

_May 2nd  
><em>_I'm sure Yuu's been following me. I'll turn around as I think I've seen him from the corner of my eye, but he's not there. Maybe I'm imagining things._

_June 4th  
><em>_Tyki and I went out for lunch today. Lavi happened to be in the café and invited himself to join us. He got too close, putting his arm around me. I was telling him to stop but he leaned in for a kiss. Before his lips could reach mine I shoved him, hard. He fell off his chair and lay on the floor of the café. I left after that. I hope he gets the message now. I must apologise to Tyki in the morning._

_July 24th  
><em>_This is getting ridiculous! I'm late getting in from work through having to avoid Lavi and then Yuu is cold to me when I do get in! What is with him? Doesn't he know how much it hurts to have the one you love ignore you? He can sleep on the sofa again tonight._

_July 29th  
><em>_Yuu has gone very quiet. I wish he would talk to me. Hopefully, the special day I've got planned for the 1st will cheer him up. It'll be one year since we moved in together._

_July 31st  
><em>_All set! Restaurant booked, roses ordered, special 'surprise' organised. I hope Yuu enjoys tomorrow._

Finally, the tears fell. Kanda was shocked at himself. Allen hadn't been having an affair as he had thought. He couldn't believe how stupid he had been. He should have just asked Allen what was going on! Kanda dropped Allen's journal to the floor. Just as he was about to stand, he noticed the final entry. It was from that morning.

_August 1st  
><em>_Today, it is one year since I moved in with Yuu. What a year it has been! I am going to ask Yuu to explain the distance he has out between us. I want to get everything sorted out and back to normal before this evening. I know Yuu doesn't say but I know he loves me and I love him more than anything in the world. After all the things we put each other through over the years I know we can sort this out._

Kanda knew what he had to do now. Standing, he grabbed his katana from the wall and headed to the bathroom.

He looked at the white tiles on the wall. He looked at the shower. He even looked at the ceiling. Finally, his eyes came to rest on the centre of the floor. There lay Allen, his blood surrounding him. Kanda watched, hoping the younger man would breathe but he knew he wouldn't. Kanda had done that. The knife was still next to Allen.

Kneeling, Kanda pulled Allen into his arms. He placed his sword next to him, unsheathed.

'Allen, I'm so sorry. I just found your journal. I hope that you don't mind but I read it. How could I ever have doubted you? I know its useless now but I hope you can still hear me. I love you, Allen, more than life.'

Kanda lent down and placed his lips on the cold, lifeless ones of his lover. Laying Allen back down gently, Kanda reached for his sword.

'Remember that I love you Allen. Please forgive me,' Kanda whispered as he plunged his sword into his stomach.

Slowly pulling the blade out, Kanda lay next to Allen and waited for death to claim him.


End file.
